Is your child often angry?
Do you dread the angry emotional outbursts?
Do you feel helpless as to how to stop it once it starts?
Do you get the feeling that your child is not really angry but that there is something else behind it? If you do, you would be right! The angry outbursts or meltdowns are not real anger. When you begin to experience repeated incidents of anger meltdowns, stop and ask yourself, what message is my child sending me with this behavior? What am I supposed to investigate in order to find the real cause or causes so that I can help my child?
Everything is Connected. Nothing Happens in Isolation
Meltdowns are a message to parents and caregivers that three things may be happening:
- The child’s spirit is hurting. Something is causing the child to feel:
- The child’s hurting spirit has made the body vulnerable. This could reveal itself in a whole array of biological problems, just a few possibilities being:
- Parasites, bacteria, worms or fungus in the GI system
- Vitamin deficiencies
- Heavy metal toxicity
- Gut problems, including the possibility of irritable bowel or leaky gut
- The hurting spirit and hurting body have made the brain vulnerable, affecting the balance of brain chemistry.
Parents who struggle with their children’s angry meltdowns would be advised to look for the ‘hidden’ spirit-body-brain causes. Michael is 9 years old. He is a smart, funny, curious kid who could change from being sweet and good to being uncontrollably angry in seconds. Mom and dad never know what would trigger this. After trying many forms of therapy without much sustainable improvement in Michael’s behavior, they decided to look at his anger as a spirit-body-brain problem.
The spirit-body-brain analysis revealed that:
Michael feels inadequate and constantly compares himself unfavorably to his brother and his peers. In his perception everyone else is smarter, happier, more likable, capable and handsome than he is. This persistent emotional stress in his spirit affected his adrenal system resulting in his tendency to resort to fight as a way of coping. His anger was also intensified by the fact that he had high levels of fungus in his intestines and lead in his body. Michael’s angry outbursts are now considerably less frequent and when they do occur they are far less explosive and do not last long since he received treatment for the fungus and lead and as he continues to have coaching to increase his emotional resilience and self-esteem. Michael was in danger of being diagnosed as being a bi-polar child or as having an oppositional defiant disorder, either of which would have been a seriously dangerous misdiagnosis with frightening long-term consequences.
While some misbehavior may be due to negative attention seeking, full-blown fits of rage are usually not and parents would be well advised to explore the bigger spirit-body-brain picture because nothing happens in isolation.